Welcome to my heart.

I find I don’t know how to start.  For someone who loves words, they now escape me.

I’ll just write.  You just read.  Between us, I hope we can connect.

It’s interesting.  This journey called life.  Things I use to be certain about and now know are bunk.  Things I once thought was bunk are now certainties.

A handful of years ago, darkness submerged my life.  I felt useless.  Lost.  Unlovable.  An abject failure.

I hated my life.

I realized one night that I had to let go.  The person I was no longer worked.  My life experiences taught me beautiful, powerful lessons that were incongruent with who I was.  I wanted to accept those truths but who I was wouldn’t allow it.  Faced with a choice of either jumping off into the abyss or staying on the ledge, I chose to jump.

I had nothing to lose.

Oddly enough, falling into the abyss, allowed me to open my desiccated heart, open my mind.  My open heart drank from the pure waters of the truth.  My individual truth.

The more my heart drank, the more it beat.  It beat in a way I hadn’t felt in years.

When I feel, I want to write.  Verbalize those ideas, those dreams, those truths.  Maybe to try and remember the feeling, maybe to share with others.  Who knows.

I do know that story, something woven into my DNA since childhood, now became center of my core being.

Part of this journey was acknowledging that I was subject to a higher power.  God.  The Universe.  Whatever you wish to call it.

The more I trusted in myself, the more I trusted in the higher power, the more doors opened for me.

God laid upon my beating heart one simple message.  “It’s time to grow.”

I didn’t know what that meant.  Or what that entailed.  But I was tired of fighting against the inevitable tide.  Instead, I relaxed.  I allowed myself to drift in this new direction.

Funny enough, while thinking of growth, the recurring them of Leadership continued to pop up.  I’m not talking about the actual word.  But through sheer random coincidence.  Like news articles appearing in front of me.  Podcasts talking of Leadership.  People recommending me books on leadership.  All without me asking or prompting.

So I chased it.  Let’s see where this can take me.

But I knew leadership wasn’t about just leading others.

When I read this quote, I realized exactly what I was to do.

“The ultimate definition of leadership is empowering others to become effective leaders as well.” – Tony Robbins, Life Strategist and New York Times Best Selling Author.

Sure, one level of leadership involves other people.  But leaders also exist in families.  Leaders also exist with each of us.  The decisions we make, the actions we take.

The moment we decide to positively impact someone else, we become a leader.  The moment we decide to positively impact ourselves, we become a leader.

Now that I’m in a committed relationship, now that I have two kids who watch my every move … I’m aware that every action, every word makes a mark on them.  I choose to be my best in the hopes that somehow I will impact them.  That they will chose to be their best.  Whatever form that might take.

If I can positively impact and inspire others to do the same, then my mission is one step closer to being complete.

I love my life.

I am so blessed.

As I push out this podcast, as I share these incredible stories, more doors open.  People are choosing to be a part of this journey, this adventure.

And if your eyes are still here, I believe you chose to be a part of this journey.  I invite you to come along for as long as you want.

This is my truth.

Welcome to my heart.